"K.P."

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0><tr> <td valign="top" colspan=2 height=90 BGCOLOR="#006699" TEXT="#080000" bgproperties="fixed" background="11f285a1erlcgo.png"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#FFCC66" FACE="Arial" ><B>Berton Braley Cyber Museum</B></FONT><B>     |     </B><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Berton Braley Cyber Museum"><U><B>home</B></U></A><B>     </B></div> <div>                                                   </div> <div> </div> </td> </tr><tr> <td valign="top" width=210 BGCOLOR="#FFCC66" TEXT="#080000" background="11ed2c00dkelyh.png"> <div> <A HREF="news_.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="News"><U>News</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="biography.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Biography"><U>Biography</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="works.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Works"><U>Works</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="bibliography.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Bibliography"><U>Bibliography</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="correspondence.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Correspondence"><U>Correspondence</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="library.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Library"><U>Library</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="meeting_place.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Meeting place"><U>Meeting place</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="guestbook.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Guestbook"><U>Guestbook</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="market.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Market"><U>Market</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="links.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Links "><U>Links </U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="search.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Search"><U>Search</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="id400.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="About Foundation"><U>About Foundation</U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="about_museum.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="About Museum"><U>About Museum</U></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" height=390 BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <I>"K.P."</I><I>                                                                                                   </I></div> <div> - A Training Camp Ballad (with apologies to Bill Leonard) from: Songs Of The Training Camps  (Officers Training School)</div> <bR> <div> <I><B>Oh, Kitchen Police is the duty that creases</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>A lot of new lines in your brow,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>It keeps a guy hustling when detailed for rustling,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The daily allowance of chow;</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The murphies I'm peeling have set my mind reeling,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>I've done seven billion and three,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>When I get away from this job I'll be gray from K.P.</B></I></div> <bR> <div> <I><B>But there's no escaping from scrubbing and scraping,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The pans and the pots and the plates,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>And bringing in fuel and ladling out gruel,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>And paring the onions by crates;</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>My nerves are all shaken from smelling the bacon,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The coffee, the beans, and the tea,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>My hunger's departed; who was it that started K.P.?</B></I></div> <bR> <div> <I><B>I thought I'd be fighting the Germans, and righting</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The wrongs that the papers portrayed,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>And here I am wearing an apron, and bearing</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The task of a scullery maid;</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>Why, drilling is easy compared to the greasy,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>Hard labor they've handed to me,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>This cleaning of fishes and juggling of dishes, K.P.!</B></I></div> <bR> <div> <I><B>Say, when by a drive at the Bosche, we arrive at</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>The widely known town of Berlin,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>And cheerfully--rather!--we reach out and gather</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>the kaiser and Hindenburg in,</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>I've got a suggestion to settle the question</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>Of what we shall do with 'em; Gee!</B></I></div> <div> <I><B>I'd thrill to be viewing the pais of them doing, K.P.!</B></I></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <div> <I>Published in: </I><A HREF="woman_s_world.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Womans World"><U><I>Woman's World magazine</I></U></A><I>, September 1918</I></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <A HREF="copyright.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Copyright"><U><I>© 2000-2006, Berton Braley Cyber Museum. </I></U></A></div> <div> <A HREF="copyright.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Copyright"><U><I>All rights reserved.</I></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <I>---</I></div> <div> <A HREF="mailto:info@bertonbraley.com" TARGET="_top" TITLE="mailto:info@bertonbraley.com"><U><I>Contact Webmaster Peter Leeflang</I></U></A><FONT SIZE="3" COLOR="#000000" FACE="Arial" ><A HREF="mailto:info@bertonbraley.com" TARGET="_top" TITLE="mailto:info@bertonbraley.com"><U> </U></A></FONT></div> <bR> <div> <I><B> </B></I></div> </td> </tr></table></body>